slowing down


stop, take a look around you before moving on. you probably realised you've missed out a lot of things.

11:22 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



words and confusion


Words and actions contradict themselves. I don't know what to believe in. I hate these sleepless nights.

12:43 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



best quote from vanessa


"I'm quite sick of people asking me when they are not going through it with me like my parents"



i can't help but to agree.

1:04 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



being happy


I'm happy with my life now, as in truthfully happy. Thanks to all those who has always been there, you know who you are.


Hugs and Kisses,
Claire

12:16 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



reflections


Sometimes you need to slow down or take a step back to look at the way things are, and decide if that is really what you want. Some things are left better to be ambiguous.

11:32 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



taking the time out


Sometimes when you get upset, all you need is to hug someone to sleep. It really comforts a lot. Thank you I'm feeling much much better. (=


And I can't imagine I actually survived hanging in JP for 3 - 4 damn hours. Finally I've bought a big piece of jigsaw puzzle, together with a friend, to fix. It's strange how i could not use to find time out to do such a thing though I've always wanted to. Perhaps it's a matter of how willing you are to take time out.


Totally worn out now but I've to clear my room for space.

10:29 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



the whole thing turns out wrong




1:31 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



getting in touch


Some how or rather I've been waking up wanting to see a message on my phone. What kinda syndrome is that man.


And what's up with SingTel (or my friend's phone rather) the reception is so bad that we can't even receive messages on time. I hate lags, breaks down the communication system and it can get quite annoying at times most of the time. Telecoms companies does the weirdest things ever - like taking turns to be problematic. It gets so irritable to the extend no ones wants to talk about it.


On a random note, i need a job to feed my drinking habit. Give me ANYTHING!


Oh Oh, it looks like my sister's birthday is arriving. Maybe i should get her a huge bottle of liquor which i would be more than happy to help her finish. Don't worry I'm usually not that sinister. It just happens once in a while.


"Actually most of us don't drink nor smoke not because we seriously believe it's harmful. Come on! It's more of a social stigma that's stopping us. And when you give it a try, you start to wonder if it's really a bad thing cause it doesn't seem like anything near it." -- Quoting from what liying said last night. Thinking bout it, it sounds logical and could be any more right.

11:46 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



allthegayshitfuck


Honestly, you'd never know what's good for me if you don't even know what i want. What's so wrong bout staying out late at night anyway? Go ahead and judge me but don't ever think of imposing you thoughts on me. I'm not that kid that takes whatever you give. I've a mind of my own and far more than that.


A good night ended in a bad way.


Very much appreciated the time spent eating chocolate cake and talking about everything. Though certain things still seem a little ambiguous to me, but still Thank You. I probably hurt myself too much with the flames. But i guess pain is only temporary. Nothing really last anyway.

1:06 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



i just want to say




11:03 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



Can Chinese be taught?


Sis was making preparations for O level Chinese and she asked me how to read a Chinese character.

Me: "Chinese can be taught??"
Sis: "Of course la, if not how Chinese teachers teach?"
Me: "Precisely, they never teach so i never learn"

4:14 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



"i think you are addicted to firing your boss huh"


Perhaps the side effect of getting to drunk for your own good. Staying sober isn't a necessarily a good thing either.

Finally i met the person i wanted to see most - Adeline. Got drunk silly with Liying on Friday night and popped over MOS to find Ade and WQ. Just like i thought, the same old nagging from both of them and listening to Ade yakking away. France sound like a hell lot of fun i wished i had been there. Thank God LiYing stayed over my place which apparently saved me from mom's nagging. But i think i got assaulted by LiYing last night, I woke up with a 9cm (width) by 3cm (height) bruise on my left thigh. More nights like these please! (except the bruise)

2:45 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



on external factors and internal expectations


I've always enjoyed intellectual conversations with Vanessa. She'll always teach me (as in not literally) how to learn fight myself and not always end up losing.

12:01 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



little things that makes me feel better


mccanny: i'm short by 0.1 for it. and i'm still feeling hateful
harold: aiya ur cs queen status more valuable den dat 0.1 man



if only that title was an achievement.

8:00 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



always the same case


Why has it have to be like this? When would everything be right? I'm quite sick of all these suspense and uncertainties. F-ck.

7:41 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



on pretence


It’s strange how it all seemed like a passing fad. Perhaps one day we’ll sit down together and laugh at our silliness.

12:41 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



giving up the world for nothing


I’ve been such an idiot.
I could survive anything but not this.
Apparently it never meant to be mine.

————-

When you try your best but you don’t succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can’t sleep
Stuck in reverse.

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can’t replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Coldplay

11:19 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



on being jobless

Being jobless doesn't seems as bad as it seemed to be. Waking up with nothing to look forward isn't a stranger to me considering the fact i survived 6 months like this. Some other times i wished i needn't have to wake up.

My supposedly Spiderman 3 date turned to 200 pounds beauty date. But i guess it didn't really matter cause i wasn't paying much attention to what's on the screen. Should i continue to say why? No. Period.

11:37 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



excuse me


excuse me that spot is mine.

2:52 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



when it takes longer than usual


top up service at 7-11 can't top up ez-link card
value add machine can't read my atm card
trying to fetch a cab but some idiot guy must come and try to hit on me

one word, bugs. as irritating as they can get.


today i sounded everyone out. somehow it seems like there is unanimity in the workplace. it's getting exciting to see how things start to unfold.


i'm glad to announce that i've accomplished the level of falling asleep while standing. my eyelid simply refuse to open the entire morning. it's so bad that i had to sneak to the back and catch a nap when my manager and boss are gone. all thanks to sleeping at 4am last night. i probably haven't had such a long talk with someone for such a long time. as usual, being crazy and working on how to piss the management off. found out some shocking stuff, which, amazingly made me confused of my own emotions. it scares me a little, my reaction that is. maybe i'm not normal myself, i just didn't really realised it.


side tracking. sometimes u try so hard to put the pieces back and they decide to start falling apart at a random rate. then you realise that's when you start to hate. you start hating because it was simpler than it was to start loving again.

11:35 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



just like that


most of the time i say "do i look like i care?" not because i don't care, but because i don't wish to care.


sometimes i'm afraid to tell what's bothering me cause it makes me look like an idiot.

3:50 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



lesbian and whatever


mccanny : i must learn frm my mom so next time i can defend my child(if any)

scolionophobic : haha. i dont think i'd ever be a parent, so no worries.

mccanny : still early to say. maybe down the road i see u with a dozen kids

scolionophobic : haha. well i guess nothing's certain. but my ex is a girl leh

mccanny : GREAT! NOW WE CAN BE TOGETHER

2:18 AM
i spilled milk on the lawn



alcoholic


c: "stop drinking so much, it's bad for health"
b: "ya ya, the one who's asking me to stop is a alcoholic herself"


just a random conversation

11:20 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn



a whole lot better


I'll leave the shadow behind, completely

And someday you'll be proud of me

Proud that I've made it, by myself

Things will be a whole lot better

Yes, it will be

11:50 PM
i spilled milk on the lawn

29/11/87
a little mystery is good. go figure.


sometimes i love all these pain i'm going through cause they remind me how much a failure i am.

04:00am
12/07/07

chocolate; herself


cockroaches; someone


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